It seems that one of the most common questions we're asked about the adoption is Where are you in the process? So, I thought I'd try to explain a bit about adopting from Korea and where we are right now.
We submitted our initial application about three weeks ago. This application was about six pages long and covered our basic information -- dates of birth and marriage, social security numbers, education, employment information, etc. A few days after submitting the application to our agency (Lifelink), we were notified that we were officially on the waiting list. Lifelink is somewhat unique in international adoption in that they put individuals on the waiting list upon submission of the initial application, instead of at completion of home study (at least when adopting from South Korea), as most agencies do.
We are now working on the self study, which basically requires us to write about our lives from childhood to the present. It covers topics such as the homes in which we were raised, relationships with siblings, feelings about school as a child, current contact with family members, hobbies & interests, dating & courtship, our expectations of marriage, how we handle conflict in marriage, and motivation for adoption. We are planning to finish up the self study in the next few days and send it to our social worker.
Then, next week we have the first meeting of our home study. A home study might sound pretty intimidating (at least it did to me), but it's actually not bad at all from what we hear. The home study consists of four meetings, at the end of which our social worker will write a report documenting the fact that we would be good parents. (We hope that's what she says at least!) For our first home study meeting next week, we will meet with our social worker at her office. Then, for the second and third meetings, Brad and I will meet with her individually at her office. Our social worker will then meet with us together in our home for the fourth meeting. As part of this meeting, she will make sure that our home is a safe, healthy environment for a child.
At the meeting next week, our social worker will go over the list of documents we need to collect/complete as part of the home study, as well as the immigration paperwork that we need to do. We are also required to take part in adoptive parent training, so we're hoping to find out exactly what's involved in that next week as well. We're looking forward to getting all this information so we can get rolling on everything we need to do.
Another thing we have to do is become licensed as a foster home. Korea is unlike most other countries in that the legal adoption is done in the United States instead of the country from which the child is adopted. So, we will legally adopt our child in a local court six months after we return from Korea. For that six-month period, the child will technically be our foster child.
We will most likely not complete the home study until at least the end of this year, and more likely sometime early next year. We are intentionally dragging out the home study a bit (at the suggestion of Lifelink) so it doesn't expire before we receive a referral (meaning our name has made its way to the top of the list and we are matched with a child). Once the home study is complete, we don't really have any further paperwork or training to do until referral. So, we will spend this time preparing our home for the arrival of our child!
When we receive a referral (current estimate is around 12 months from application, so late summer or early fall 2010), we will then have more paperwork to do...followed by more waiting while documents are processed by the US government, the agency in Korea, and the Korean government. We're not very familiar with this part of the process yet, but I'm sure we'll learn. It takes 3-6 months after referral for all the immigration paperwork to be done so our child is ready to come home.
Once we get the call that our child is ready to travel, we will be on a flight to Seoul within a couple of days to meet him and bring him home. Korea is one of the very few countries that allows children to be escorted to the United States (instead of the parents traveling), but we, like many adoptive parents, are excited to travel to Korea! We are looking forward to seeing where our child spent the first months of his life, experiencing the culture of Korea for a few days, and taking lots of pictures!!
Korea is also unique in that the children are cared for by foster families, rather than in orphanages. From everything we've heard, the foster mothers are amazing women who love these babies and take incredible care of them. We look forward to meeting our child's foster family in Korea and hopefully maintaining contact with them after that.
You might notice that I refer to our child as he. We are almost certain we will be referred a boy. There are more boys than girls available for international adoption in Korea, so those families not requesting a certain gender are usually referred a boy. When I say "almost certain we will be referred a boy," that means it is at least 99% sure. So, we are fully planning for a boy but will be absolutely thrilled either way.
Well, that was probably more information than you wanted about adopting from Korea. We want to reiterate that we are very open to questions. Feel free to post a comment here, shoot us an email, or catch us in "real life" to ask ANY questions you might have.
We are so thankful for our amazing family and friends. The excitement, love, and support you expressed when we announced our plans last week mean so much to us! We appreciate your prayers as we continue down this road.
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